I've been creating a resume and a strategy in preparation for my job search, so I haven't had much time for blogging recently. Does anyone know where employers are seeking philosophers with long-term experience as retail buyers, having strong writing, organizational, and computer skills, for positions that involve creativity, decision-making, working with others, excellent pay, continuing education, good hours, benefits including health coverage and vacation packages, in a friendly, professional environment?
What? That job's taken? Go figure ...
I'm really eager to engage everyone in some more philosophic discussion (pseudo-philosophic discussion rather, since the blogging venue is not really conducive to truly deep discussion; still, it's great for cross-pollenation of stimulating ideas).
The topics I have in mind require some time to prepare, which I haven't had recently. In the meantime, I will share some more about my other great passion: my family.
My wife works very hard. She is a childbirth educator, labor doula, and regional representative of a chilbirth professional association. She works out of our home and takes care of our two energetic young girls all day while I putter about at my place of work. In her spare time, she is studying for certification as a childbirth educator trainer - so she can help other women to do what she does. I help out somewhat when I get home, but she does the bulk of the housework. She's a human dynamo. Sometimes it takes a lot out of her. Yesterday was one of those days.
I got home and she was asleep. I think she caught a bug that's been going around. I told her to go back to bed. I made a light dinner for me and the kidlets: falafel (yum!) and a salad of fresh chopped tomatoes and cucumbers with Italian dressing. It may not seem like much, but I'm a vegetarian, and we eat five or six small meals a day. "If you eat some of your salad, then you can have watermelon for dessert," I told them.
This was my brilliant plan to get them to eat diced tomatoes and cucumbers, lightly coated with virgin olive oil and a hint of vinegar, delicately seasoned with aromatic Italian herbs; you know - that runny mixture of mushy red bits and slimy green ones, with seeds? I couldn't imagine they would say no if they knew there would be a sweet reward of watery-melon goodness at the end of it. I really expected both of them to eat some of their salad.
Usually, Simcha eats just about anything we put in front of her, if she's hungry. Havilah is the picky one. She'd rather starve than eat what suspiciously looks, smells, or has the texture of something nutritive and healthy. I was unprepared for what happened. Havilah wrinkled up her nose and ate much of her salad. Simcha didn't. That was just the beginning.
I tried to encourage Simcha to eat it. Our conversation went something like this:
ME: Simcha, do you want some watermelon?
S: Yeah, daddy. [I should add that she was very distracted by "The Incredibles", a dvd we purchased over the weekend. Great film!]
ME: Then eat some of your salad.
S: Um- [her eyes flickering briefly over to me, then back to the tv] No, daddy. I don wat salat.
ME: Well, no watermelon then.
[A few moments pass. I'm not at all sure she understands the import of what I am saying. So ...]
ME: Simcha, eat some of your salad. Then you can have some watermelon.
S: Uh no daddy. I don wat salat. I wanwatermelon.
ME: Then eat your salad. You can't have watermelon unless you eat - your - salad.
[Simcha looks at me. She looks at her salad. She looks at me again. She looks at the tv.]
S: Um. No, daddy. Thas not water melon. Thas salat.
Me: Simcha-
S: YOU are e-LAST-i-girl!!!! [arms upraised, doing her best Edna Mode impression]
I felt bad for her. She really wanted that watermelon. I didn't feel bad that I was using threats/bribes to get her to eat the salad; I felt bad because she didn't understand what the conditions were. No matter how i tried to explain, she just didn't get it, even after I had her full attention. She got SO excited when I was cutting it up, because she thought she was going to get some.
I think she understands the concept now.
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6 comments:
All I can think of is that voice on Pink Floyd's The Wall, the one with the Scottish accent:
If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding. How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?! Over and over again, in a tape loop.
Poor Simcha. Poor Daddy.
Q
I know i'm not the only parent to feel this way. Insecure, I mean.
Sometimes I really worry about whether I am making mistakes as a parent. Was it right to enforce conditions that my child did not understand? (Is it even right to try to coerce them into eating what they don't want to eat? I mean, usually Simcha eats with no problem. Did I go too far? But I really only came up with the rule so that Havilah would eat. I applied it to both of them so they wouldn't think me unfair ...)
Then I realize that mistakes are unavoidable, and that often, there is no perfect behavior or solution to every circumstance. The most important thing is that I love them and make the best decisions I can for them.
Excessively long? Are you kidding, Mary? Have you seen any of my recent posts on q's blog?
i get excited when I see a long comment. I am honored when someone is moved to take the time to write a substantial response.
Havilah is five, Simcha is about three-and-a-half.
Your advise is excellent.
your girl is cute and smart too. my niece is the same. she doesnt like vege. she loves chocolates but she is allergic to peanuts. during my visits, she cries all the time. chocolat chocolat.... phew .. parenting..can be tough job, not sure when i am ready.
any luck with your resume and future projects? any word on your life? are you that busy you can't throw up a minut description of your life for fives seconds ;)
hope all is going well.. your a damn good parent, so don't concern yourself with minor communicatory errors... i would of course have turned off the television when i noticed the child paid more attention to the tv then to her dinner.. but then again i'm not a parent.. and i have a distinct anger towards television...
distinct as opposed to non-distinct or vague anger... that makes no sense i guess.. hehe sometimes i use words in the stragest methods... ok back to sending resume's out... still haven't heard a yay or nay for the twenty i've sent out yet... except the temp job might get me a permanent position... whatever permanent means...
talk to you soon i hope..
That's funny, I was busy editing my latest post just as you wrote this one.
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